Blog

Parenting From The Spectator Section, and Vacation 3.0

Apologies for the blogging silence for the past couple of weeks. I’ve been trying out a new style of vacation – one focused primarily on visiting children.

It’s not that I haven’t been doing the things I’d generally do on a vacation – I have. The difference is that the primary focus has been on spending time with my son, and finding ways to do things with him.

He’s been working in Vietnam for the past several months. While he likes traveling, enjoys the work he’s doing, and loves having new adventures, he’s still a guy who’s firmly anchored to his home.Vietnam is a long way from home.

While we get to talk on Skype most mornings for a good long bit, (isn’t technology wonderful?!), he’s still struggled with being away from home for such a long time. I’ve felt the homesickness from him often when we’ve talked.

It’s one of the hardest parts of being a parent – seeing your children struggle in some way, or hearing pain in their voice. My instinct is always to fix something, to make something go away, to vanquish a monster someplace. When they’re young, you can generally find a way to do that.

But as they get older, and move on to a life of their own, there’s less and less you can do. And frankly, less and less you should do. If we’ve done our job as a parent well, then we’ve prepared them to fix things themselves, and to vanquish most of the monsters on their own.

I’m a spectator now, not a player on the field of battle. I’ve had to learn hard lessons over the years about listening carefully when my kids tell me about their battles, and to understand they aren’t asking for my sword – they’re asking for my ear. They want to know my sword is there if they need it, and that my counsel is there if they ask for it, but mostly they just want me to listen.

It’s hard sometimes to just listen, to not step in with a sword or an axe or a shovel. I think I’ve gotten better at it over the years as they’ve taught me. Now I’m learning to keep my counsel to myself more often as well, to watch carefully for the signs that they might actually want to hear my advice. The more I keep my mouth shut and my ears open, the more they come to trust that they can ask me for advice when they want it.

I’m not good at it yet, but I’m learning.

This trip has been about being there at the hotel when he comes home from work at the end of the day, and asking how things went. It’s been about listening to his stories of the dragons that he battles every day, and being proud and amazed at how well he wages those battles. It’s been about enjoying his expertise of this new world he lives in – the best places to find amazing food, the best places to get a foot massage, and how to get around in a world where you don’t speak their language.

Sure we’ve done some fun and amazing things together. We spent the Tet holiday at the ancient Angkor ruins in Cambodia, and spent time on a cruise boat in one of the most amazing bays on earth. But mostly, we’ve shared a glass together at the end of the day, and laughed about the quirky sense of humor we share. We’ve wandered slowly through fish markets and night markets, enjoying the wonder of a culture I could only have imagined.

But mostly I’ve listened. And I’ve enjoyed his company more than he can know, and more than I would have imagined. As I type this, it’s just beginning to get light outside my hotel room window. It’s the start of our last day together before my 34 hour trek back to Colorado. I’m sure we’ll spend more time in markets today, and probably a good bit of time just hanging out together. Then we’ll hug each other and say goodbye.

And I’ll do the hardest thing a parent can do – go sit in the spectator section.

I’m not good at it yet, but I’m learning…

Corruption – Just Questions For Now

After spending a couple weeks in SE Asia, I’m working hard on putting together an adjusted view of the concept of corruption, and how it effects the way we’re able to live our lives.

The first observation is that nearly all the “westerners” we met had a firm and preconceived notion of what corruption was, and how awful it is in SE Asia. For the most part, they came here prepared to be appalled at the level of corruption in the governments here, and the level of poverty of the people, and they were generally able to find ways to be appalled by exactly what they wanted to be appalled by. In most cases, I think their expectations were exceeded.

Because corruption is certainly evident and destructive over here. They don’t try too hard to hide it.

My second observation was that folks who lived here had the same view of government that most people all over the world have of their own government. That is, they think the government is corrupt, and that folks with money and power find ways to bilk the common folk from whatever they have in order to continue to line the pocketbooks of those who already have money and power. They think that the government is usually nothing more than a tool for those with the money and power.

Hard to disagree with that point of view.

I want to use the term “lifestyle”, but I want to define my use of it first. Most westerners see this word and think it means what kind of car a person drives, how big their house is, how expensive the restaurants are that a person eats at, how elaborate a person’s vacations are, etc. Because for most westerners, that’s how lifestyles are delineated.

But for most of the folks over here, the delineation is far wider than this. There is a wide gap between the masses of folks who work 7 days a week for $5/day if they’re lucky, and the very few who have all the power and wealth.

That said, I think the corruption over here is more offensive to us for two reasons:

  1. It seems so much more “wrong” to us that so many live lives of such poverty, while so few skim the bribes at their expense.
  2. The corruption is so evident – they don’t know how to hide it well.

I need to noodle on this for a while, and want to write about it. For now, I only want to say that the nature of this whole corruption thing feels a little different than I expected it to feel. It’s nasty and evil without a doubt. Beyond that, though, I’m not sure it stacking itself up in the nice neat little package I’ve been taught to observe.

Back to that Tall Ships post again – this doesn’t fit a pattern I have yet, and I need to noodle through it a bit to see if I can fathom the shapes I think I see out there…

    We The People vs The Big Lobby

    OK, who said this and when:

    “We are against forcing all citizens, regardless of need, into a compulsory government program.” Arguing that he was against socialized medicine, he said that, “one of these days, you and I are going to spend our sunset years telling our children’s children what it once was like in American when men were free.”

    And the answer is: Ronald Reagan.

    Probably not much of a surprise so far, but he said it in the 60’s talking about Medicare.

    Here’s a link to some really good reading about the Medicare debate in the 60’s.

    We should look at this debate carefully. Many at the time were convinced of the evil of having the government get involved in medicine. Here we are decades later, and Medicare is a popular and successful program. It certainly could be improved – as anything can. But that’s not a condemnation of the idea, any more than Enron or AIG are condemnations of the idea of free enterprise.

    We’re in much the same spot today. The right wing is using the same arguments today they used then – which have proven true, and which have proven false?

    I’m just a conservative guy. All I know is that in this country, we spend twice as much on healthcare as any other modern country, and we get less for it. Why have so many other countries gotten it so much more right than us? What can we learn from them? Again, being a conservative guy, I don’t like spending more and getting less. I don’t like spinning my wheels when I can learn from the mistakes of the past and learn from what folks are doing well.

    Case in point: During the healthcare debate, one of the proposals put forward by the left was to allow folks to “opt in” to Medicare for a fee. Essentially, it put Medicare out there as an insurance program that I could buy into if I wanted to or needed to. Seems pretty logical to me. After all, if the right wing is right, and Medicare is so inefficient and ineffective, then nobody will buy in anyway – private insurers will be far more cost effective and provide far better care. Right?

    Then why did the right wing argue against this, and make sure it wasn’t part of the reform? All by itself, this puts the lie to the argument. If they believed what they were saying was true, they would welcome this option. If they knew what they were arguing was untrue, they would fear this option.

    They feared the option, and assured that you and I did not have the ability to “buy in” to Medicare, forcing us instead to pay higher prices to private companies, and receive less from these private companies.

    It’s clear to me why private companies spend so much to make sure that we don’t have a “public option”. They apparently believe that the public option will provide better care for less money, and that they’ll lose much of their base to this public option. They will no longer be skimming huge profits from the premiums you and I pay.

    If I were a major shareholder in one of these companies, I’d spend a lot of money trying to defeat public healthcare – it would be in my selfish interest to do so.

    But I’m not a major shareholder in one of these companies. I’m just an American Citizen – part of We The People. My selfish interest is getting the best care possible for the lowest cost. It seems to me that the interest of the big private insurance lobby is at odds with the interest of We The People in this case.

    Robbing Peter to Pay Paul – Still

    This is so darned simple. It amazes me that the media and politicians can continually make it sound so complex. We’ve dug ourselves into this debt hole over the past 30 years as a result of irresponsibility, demonstrated in 2 ways:

    1. First, politicians lower taxes without cutting spending. This is really simple math, and no amount of voodoo economics will make this a different equation than it is.
    2. Second, we as voters must bear responsibility for electing the politicians who continually tell us the happy stories about how we can just keep charging things on the credit card without taking accountability for what we’re spending.

    It’s no more complex than that. While I might blame the neoliberals for starting us down this path, at some point, we as voters must take accountability for our decision in election after election to vote for the guy who says “cut taxes”, rather than the guy who says “be accountable”. Since politicians learned back in the 80’s that we wouldn’t pay attention to the debt as it ballooned out of control, they just kept playing the game.

    The most vicious, underhanded, and filthy of the tricks they played with our money was the theft of money from the Social Security and Medicare trust funds, in order to make the deficit appear smaller than it really was.

    When the taxpayers agree to give money to the government for a specific purpose, one responsibility lawmakers have is to make sure the money goes to the purpose the taxpayers agreed. The taxpayer is entrusting money to the lawmakers, with the understanding that the lawmakers won’t skim the money to some end they decide they’d rather fund.

    That’s really simple, isn’t it? Somebody argue with me if I’m wrong about this. In this scenario, wouldn’t you consider it theft or embezzlement or at the very least fraud if a lawmaker took money you gave him for one purpose, and just decided to use it for something else?

    Back in the 80’s when this started to get out of control, I remember complaining about it to my friends, most of whom claimed to be politically conservative. How, I asked, can a conservative approve of this sort of theft, not to mention that even with the theft, we’re not balancing the budget? “It’s not theft”, they’d reply, “because it’s really just borrowing. The government is simply borrowing money from Social Security in order to temporarily fund other programs and tax cuts – when Social Security needs the money back, the government will give it to them.”

    Right. And pigs fly.

    So here we are, approaching the place where Social Security will need that money back that Congress has been “borrowing” for the past 30 years. In fact, we recently put ourselves on the express train to that spot, by reducing the amount that we, as taxpayers, pay into Social Security with each paycheck.

    Now the moment of truth is fast arriving. If I was right, and this was theft and fraud, then the response of our elected officials will be to tell us that Social Security is rapidly running out of money, and we’re going to need to reduce benefits. If I was wrong, and this is just borrowing, then the response of our elected officials will be to explain to us now how they intend to raise the money to pay back the trillions they’ve “borrowed” from Social Security over the last 30 years.

    It’s really that simple. And the answer is……

    Listen to President Obama last night in his State of the Union address. No talk of paying that debt back – just talk of how we reduce benefits.

    Listen to the news yourself, and see what you hear other elected officials saying. Is anyone talking about the money we need to raise to pay back the loan we owe to Social Security and Medicare? That debt, by the way, is $4.6 Trillion dollars. How on earth will we raise an additional $4.6 trillion, when we can’t even come close to balancing our current budget?

    The answer is clear. Our lawmakers have no intention of paying the debts that they’ve incurred. Instead, they’ll simply run away from their responsibility. That makes what’s been happening for the past 30 years theft and embezzlement – plain and simple. I wish I’d been wrong on this one, but current politics is proving me all too right…

    The older I get, the more tired I become with these losers we keep sending to Washington – the ones who’re too cowardly to own up to their responsibility to balance the budget they’re put in charge of. They can’t stand up to the taxpayer and tell the taxpayer what he really owes, so like the cowards they are, they keep telling the taxpayer they’ll reduce taxes, knowing all the while that this is irresponsible and cowardly.

    They’ll keep taking the money from our elderly, to fund their pet pork projects. When will we get tired enough of this to get rid of these losers?

    After The Tea Party, The Blues

    Well, all the new Republicans that rode into Washington on the backs of tea-party types have wasted no time at all thumbing their noses at the folks they were so happy to court during their campaign.

    Remember all that rhetoric about how bad lobbyists were? Turns out that as soon as these new Republicans were sworn in, they jumped right on the “lobby money” bandwagon, sucking up as much of that poison and corruption as they could as fast as they could. Some details here.

    Remember that whole “Pledge to America” grandstanding? Turns out that the tea-party types are pretty upset with the new Republicans for selling them out as soon as they got elected. Here is a link to the anger from tea party loyalists. Seems that in particular, it was the (seemingly false) commitment to “act immediately to reducing spending” sticks in the craw of those who thought they were electing conservatives.

    Remember the rhetoric about the whole “we the people” stuff? Remember how the tea-party types thought they were electing folks who would represent the interests of the people over the interests of corruption and greed in Washington? They got a rude awakening, as they realize the people they’ve elected may just be the very best lapdogs for those interests opposed to We The People.

    Click here for an article describing how the new Republican chairman of the House Financial Services Committee said recently that in his opinion, “Washington and the regulators are there to serve the banks.”  And those silly tea partyers thought these people they elected believed it was the other way around…

    It might sound from my tone that I’m down on tea partyers. In many ways I’m actually extremely sympathetic to their cause. At the heart of what they say they stand for, I’m in strong agreement with them. I want fiscal responsibility in Washington. I want a government that represents We The People rather than the right wing corporatist movement fueled by the rise of neoliberalism in our country. I could almost be a tea-partyer.

    Almost.

    In general, this whole notion that the tea party had that it was somehow representing the interests of We The People over the interests of the forces of the corruption and corporatism in our nation was sadly misled by some of the worst offenders of the interests of We The People, and some of those former tea partyers are starting to see that. Forces of corruption and greed were extremely happy to see some more friendly allies arrive in Washington this month, and have promptly dumped wheelbarrows full of cash in their laps to help in the effort to undue those things they hate the most – such as efforts to more tightly regulate Wall Street to reduce the risk of the sort of catastrophe that led to the trillion dollars of bank bailouts that Congress and the President leaped to provide back in 2007. (Let’s see, who had most of the power when that abomination of tax-dollar appropriation was enacted?) Here’s an article that goes into detail about those wheelbarrows of cash being dumped in the laps of these “new Republicans”, and how it’s grating many in the tea party who supported them.

    While I feel bad for friends who were so mercilessly duped in this last election. I do hope it will help redirect folks who truly believe in those core conservative principles. Maybe as we start to gear up for the next election, many of those folks who were duped by the right wing will look a little more deeply at the candidates and the issues next time around.

    It comes to this: Conservatives in this country need to reject this new-republicanism. How many times must we be duped and dumped on before we realize that there’s nothing conservative about the right wing, and yet this extreme right wing has taken over the Republican party over the last 30 years.

    We need to go through a cleansing, and reject the likes of Boehner, hypocrites who talk all day about how bad things like universal healthcare are, yet can’t wait to sign up for their own government healthcare program – the one that I pay for as a taxpayer. If the Republican Party continues to put forward extremists and hypocrites, it’s time to sit vote for someone else until they put forward the real conservatives again.

    Next time around, I’ll be looking carefully at the tea party groups. Maybe they’ve learned a hard lesson here, and maybe the real conservatives will come from their ranks next time. Unfortunately, this last time around, they were the ones who supported some of the most extreme hypocrites now lapping up corruption, greed, and lobbyists.

    Chasing or Fleeing?

    Are We Chasing Happiness or Running From Something Behind Us?

    The story is told of an old rabbi who visited a bustling town, and was nearly overwhelmed by the pace at which everyone was moving.. Everyone was running so quickly, not matter which direction they were going, so he assumed they must not all be running from something. He stopped a young man and asked him, “Why are you running?” and the man says “I’m running to make a living and find happiness”.

    The rabbi stood looking up into the young man’s face for a moment, holding his arm. When the young man tried to politely release himself to continue his errand, the rabbi bade him wait just a minute. He looked into the young man’s eyes, and asked, “What makes you so sure that the living you need to make is in the direction you’re running? How can you be sure the happiness you’re seeking is running away from you, rather than trying to catch up with you? Maybe the living you seek is behind you waiting to catch you, along with the happiness you say you want.”

    We’re all running. It’s the American way to be driven and ambitious and fast-paced. New Yorkers pride themselves in their frenetic pace.

    I don’t think you can easily change the stripes on a Zebra. I am who I am, and you are who you are. Some combination of genetic and environmental factors shaped the person we have become. I do like to go fast often. I get joy out of being productive and out of making “progress” toward some goal.

    While I can’t change these things about who I am, I certainly can force myself to stop and look around as I move through the life I’ve made for myself. I can force myself to look back behind me as well as up in front of me. I can continually ask the questions of myself:

    What am I running from?

    What am I running toward?

    Are there some things that I’m running from that should catch me? Are there times that I need to rest and wait for happiness and “living” to catch up with me?

    And the things that I chase – are they really staying so distantly in front of me, or is this my illusion? Am I continually running past some of these targets I’m chasing, not savoring the moment when I catch them, focusing my attention on the next target?

    Prayer. Probably the best way to take that moment of reflection. Probably the best way to look behind, and to look ahead, and ask those hard questions.

    Note: Story adapted from one told by Chief Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks of the British Commonwealth on a broadcast of an event on Krista Tippett’s “Being” radio show.

    Colorado Sect of State Thumbs Nose at Salary

    Tell Me Again Why You Ran For The Office?

    Front page of my Denver Post this morning, a story about the newly elected Secretary of State (Scott Gessler – R) who’d decided that he can’t live on the salary the job pays. His old job was with a law firm that represented clients on elections and campaign law issues, and apparently paid him a lot more than this new public service job pays him.

    I get that – he decided he wanted to go into public service. It’s a tough row to hoe these days, as we’ve gone through a few decades of demonizing public employees and reducing their pay dramatically in relation to the private sector.

    Was somebody twisting Gessler’s arm to make him spend all that money to run for Secretary of State? He was (presumably) smart enough to check into the salary he’s make before he spent all that money convincing the voters that he was the best guy for the job, right?

    But now, he says he can’t live on a paltry $68,500 / year, and he wants to moonlight with his old firm to make more money. Hey, I agree that’s not much money. So why’d he run?

    Aside from the issues of conflict of interest when he’s working for this private law firm who represents clients who he’s likely to oppose, I have some more basic problems with what he’s doing. Like issues of accountability.

    Hey Gessler, you ran for the office, and unless you’re willing to tell us you were too stupid to check out the salary ahead of time, I think you need to be accountable to your decision to ask us to entrust the office to you. Do your job. It’s a full-time job. As one Colorado voter, I expect you to do the job I elected you to do, and not to be working a second job.

    Don’t like the pay? I get it. So either try and get the salary raised, or quit. Hand the job over to whoever took second place in the election. These are public service jobs you’re running for, and these days, that means you don’t make much money at it. If you don’t like that, then change it, but don’t slap the voters in the face by getting us to chose you, then telling us you were just kidding – you really can’t live on what we were offering to pay you.

    Can we get a little accountability from our elected officials? The Secretary of State is the one I’d expect the most accountability from for crying out loud.

    A Dark Anniversary

    January 21, 2010 – Activist Supreme Court vs We The People

    Today was the anniversary of a dark moment in American history. It was one year ago today that an activist and extreme Supreme Court decided to open the floodgates of corruption and greed in our country, completely turning the concept of citizenship and freedom on its head in this great nation.

    Of course, I’m speaking of the disastrous Citizens United ruling by 5 extreme and activist Supreme Court justices. In this ruling, 5 justices decided that money is the same thing as speech, and a corporation can spend unlimited money to assure they have greater voice than ordinary citizens. Corporations in our country control the vast majority of the wealth of the nation, and they are answerable to nobody except their private shareholders. With this wealth, they’re able to bribe and lobby their way into the bowels of lawmaking in the country, completely unfettered in their efforts to buy and control the government of our nation.

    The Citizens United ruling opened the door to a form of fascism where the only people who are able to wield power and influence in our country are those with wealth. The last election cycle already shows the chilling effects of this dark decision, as money played an unprecedented role in electing those whose job it is to represent We The People.

    Throughout history, it’s always been the wealthy who have the most influence. Just a fact of life. However, when this great nation that I love was set up, it was set up in a way to reduce that tendency toward corruption. In our new nation, the wealthy weren’t able to silence We The People. The common man had the same voice as the wealthy man. Nobody could stifle speech – it was illegal. Since everyone had equal access to voice their opinion, and everyone’s vote counted equally, we had a democratically elected republic that worked.

    Until the Supreme Court fell into the hands of the extremists who promote corporatism. Now, we’ve established a modified version of our Constitution and Bill of RIghts. Now, the people who have the only loud voice in our nation are those with wealth, because they’re the ones who have the money it takes to buy the airwaves. It was bad enough that the airwaves were controlled by those with great wealth to start with, making it inherently difficult for a fair message to be expressed. With this ruling, we’ve made it abundantly clear that the only folks who have the right to be widely heard in this nation are those with wealth.

    Full disclosure here. I’m registered as a Republican. I’m a small business owner. I started my first small business when I was in my 20’s, and that was many decades ago. During my career, I’ve run businesses large and small across corporate America. I’m a dyed-in-the-wool Capitalist. I love free enterprise.

    And I love a free nation and a free democracy. Once we allow our democracy to be enslaved to the corporatists, we’ve not only lost our representative form of government, we’re also on our way to losing our freedoms. After that, every small businessperson in America will lose their ability to compete in business with the giants, because it will be the giants who run the sham of a government that they own. As a small businessman, I can tell you I feel that we’re well on our way to that state now.

    The overturn of this ruling should be the number one priority of every true conservative in this nation. It should be the number one priority of every small businessperson in America. It should be the number one priority of the tea party. It should be the number one priority of every true patriot who loves what this country once stood for, and what it’s rapidly retreating from.

    Neanderthal Compassion

    Does Evolution Select Against The Soul?

    Photo my Action Press / Rex Features

    I recently listened to an interview that Krista Tippett did with French geologist Xavier Le Pichon, and it got me thinking quite a bit about his point of view on our evolution as “humanity”.

    My thoughts, inspired by that interview, kept coming back to the notion that what defines us uniquely from other animals is compassion. I should also add a connection to a recent book on exactly this subject – The Prehistory of Compassion by Dr Penny Spikins.

    I’m not sure I agree completely with this notion, but I might… I just wonder a bit.

    Let’s talk about the Neanderthal. Archeological records suggest these creatures were religious (shamanic capes found as part of grave at Hortis site), that they were artistic (creating musical instruments), and that they showed compassion (remains discovered indicating an infirm tribe member was cared for throughout his life).

    I think I’d consider all these to be human characteristics – religion, art, and compassion – and they were all three part of the life and culture of a folk that we don’t consider to be “human” like we are. There are some, in fact, who believe that compassion may have been more deeply engrained in Neanderthal culture than it is in ours, and that compassion may have made Neanderthal vulnerable.

    Don’t get me wrong – I really want to believe that compassion is a uniquely human characteristic. I really want to believe that compassion is something that ties us to G-d, and that it is compassion that strikes the chords of harmony between the spirit of G-d and the soul of man.

    But I’m not there yet. I see behavior in many animals that looks a lot like compassion to me. I’ve seen mother deer or elk in clear pain over the loss of their fawn. You read stories of Chimps who carry their dead baby’s corpse for days in what appears to be mourning.

    It’s not that I question compassion as “holy” – I absolutely believe it is. Just as I believe a capacity for art and religion are “holy”. I’m just less and less convinced as time goes along that “holiness” is something that we have any sort of exclusive right to claim.

    If you read my blogs and rants much at all, you know how much I dislike the human tendency to claim one particular perspective on G-d and “righteousness” as the one and only way that G-d chooses to be part of our life. This tendency has caused more destruction in the history of mankind than anything else in my opinion.

    Why would I expect that G-d would look for some special relationship with one and only one species of mankind throughout the history of the world? Why would She choose only this most recent period in the history of our earth to establish that relationship? In fact, why would He have chosen only the creatures of this earth in the vast universe to establish a relationship with?

    As I look at the limited evidence, I think I’m prone to accept that compassion is, indeed, one of the components that creates and strengthens a soul in relationship with G-d. Moreover, I’m prone to wonder if we’ve not evolved further and further away from compassion as just such a strong component in our life.

    Are we evolving away from relationship with G-d?

    When I look around me, I see a great nation that was established to “…form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquillity, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare…” Yet, the only piece of that beautiful preamble to our constitution that we seem to pay attention to these days is the “provide for the common defense” section. Even in the past 200 years or so, we seem to have lost our focus on issues of Justice, Tranquillity, Union, and Welfare. In fact, the word “welfare” has become a nasty word in our political lexicon today.

    We established a nation on lofty principles, clearly driven by some sort of spiritual purpose. Yet, all of the spiritually motivated components of our reason for establishing a nation have become dirty words, and all we care about today is defending ourselves from the hordes of “others” who we think want to come and carry us away.

    This is our history as a human race throughout recorded history (which admittedly isn’t very long). We’ve continually moved back and forth between the selfish drive to eliminate others and the threat from others, and some sort of internal call of compassion. The further we go, the more it seems that natural selection is selecting against G-d, and selecting for human selfishness.

    The last 200 years within our nation is a microcosm of that selection process – a very frightening one.

    Photo by Erich Ferdinand

    Somehow or another, evolution selected against the Neanderthal. Our ability to conquer and defend increased as a result of that selection.

    What happened to our ability to maintain closeness with G-d?

    What’s happening to our soul?