Book Review – River God

River God: A Novel of Ancient Egypt
by WIlbur Smith
Author’s website

Wow, this is two new authors in a row that I really like.

Wilbur Smith has been writing novels for a lot of years, and I guess he has quite a following, but he’s new to me.

Bottom line: I really like his writing and his storytelling.

This is a story set in the time of Egypt when the Hyksos invaded and conquered the country, introducing the chariot to the Egyptians. In doing a little googling, I was able to identify quite a number of folks who weren’t happy with Mr. Smith’s adherence to actual historical events. As a lover of historical fiction, I like it a lot when a story follows the line of known history pretty closely, but have to say that the fact that this one may have strayed quite a bit from accepted history doesn’t bother me much.

The major events that underpin the story seem sound to me. The Hyksos invaded and conquered Egypt, the Egyptians learned from them, Egyptian culture may have been weak and full of corruption at the time. From that, Mr, Smith weaves a wonderful tale in the voice of a highly respected slave and eunuch, one that is quite an inventor, politician, thinker, and leader.

His characters are really well formed and crafted, and it’s quite easy to fall into complete empathy and understanding of each of them as the story unfolds. This is one I listened to from Audible, and the narrator was really quite good as well.

His subsequent stories in this series haven’t been rated as highly as this one, but I loved this one enough that I’ll try the next one or two anyway.

I’d like to give this 4.5 stars, but will err on the high side since the narration was so good as well.

 

Lucia Lodge and the Arrogance of Ownership

As soon as the land of any country has all become private property, the landlords, like all other men, love to reap where they never sowed, and demand a rent even for its natural produce.
~Adam Smith, Wealth of Nations

On my bicycle ride across the West this summer, I ended up in a little lodge along the coast at a place called Lucia. This was my second night out, and came at the end of a wonderful day of enjoying the Big Sur coastline.

While Lucia shows up as a town on some maps, it’s really not a town at all. It may have been an actual town in the past, but now all that’s there is a lodge and restaurant. Seems the property has been in the same family’s hands for several generations. They have a great spot – right on the coast – and they offer lodging and dining in a beautiful setting.

In many ways, it’s a shining example of free enterprise, the declination brought on by nepotism, and the arrogance and sense of entitlement that “ownership” inspires all wrapped into a single stop along the highway.

If you ignore price and attitude, and just look at the place, it’s a quaint little spot with a beautiful view. Of course, you’re in Big Sur, so it’s tough to find a spot along the highway that doesn’t have a beautiful view. The food in the restaurant is OK but certainly not great – about what you’d expect in a cafe along the highway. The rooms are tiny little things cut out of a strip-style building – quaint, quite small, and very old. The room I stay in is very run down with a pretty lousy bed and plumbing that not only doesn’t work right, but is in a state of “half-repair”. Whoever takes care of that sort of thing will finish the job when they get around to it.

But hey, that’s OK with me, my standards for motel rooms are extremely low. I’m usually happy to stay in a small-town motel that costs $35/night, knowing full-well that it’s gonna be just like this.

The problem is, this room is a couple hundred dollars a night. Really. And the meals are proportionately overpriced.

It’s the free market at work. This is the only lodge and dining along the highway for miles, and there will be a certain number of tourists that won’t have any choice but to pay those prices. Many will book online, with high expectations for the price, and will just have to live with disappointment. Their cancellation policy is quite strict – you can’t check-in until 3:00, but they don’t accept cancellations after 2:00. If you show up and are outraged at the price, you’re past the point you can cancel, and your card is charged, so you might as well stay.

I’m on vacation, and I’m OK with a reasonable fleecing now and again. So tonight, I’m getting fleeced – I might as well enjoy it. At least I’ve got a warm room to sleep in, and a beautiful view. The warm shower feels wonderful, though their wireless isn’t working, (sorry, no discount for that additional insult). I do a little writing, then walk up to the lodge for an early supper.

It’s warm and quaint in the cafe portion of the lodge. It’s less than half full – a highway closure has dramatically reduced the tourist traffic. A couple walks in, obviously looking around for a place to sit. I listen as the waitress asks them if they’re here for dinner, and they say they’re probably just going to sit and have coffee. They’re an older couple, with a Scandinavian accent. In keeping with their culture, they’re extremely polite as the waitress tells them they can get coffee at the general store next door, making it plain she doesn’t want them taking up dining room space if they’re only going to spend the price of coffee.

It seems everyone who works here is “part of the family”. They’ve developed an arrogance over the years, and a sense of entitlement to use this little piece of paradise they “own” to take every possible penny from every possible traveler. They’ve been blessed with a wonderful place in a beautiful location, but their connection to this wonderful little corner of paradise has been twisted. They don’t seem to see it as a gift and blessing that also allows them to make a living. Instead, I get the feeling they see it as a cash cow to milk for all it’s worth.

Many years ago, when I was immersed in Corporate America, I sat in a meeting where the CEO was railing at his management team about poor profit performance. It was a smaller company by today’s standards, and there was clearly frustration around the table at economic conditions that were making it difficult to get the profit margins we had seen in previous years. The CEO was more frustrated than any of us, and he slammed his fist on the table as he stated with absolute conviction that, “we have a moral right to make a profit.”

I think he truly believed those words when he spoke them. He was a decent and “good” man, kind in many ways. He had built a profitable enterprise with many years of hard work. I think he truly believed that he was “entitled” to make a profit – it was his moral right as a hard-working entrepreneur.

At the time I was stunned, but over the years I’ve come to accept this attitude as pretty darned common in the culture and economy we’ve created. We’ve evolved (or devolved perhaps) back toward the feudal mentality that was common before the Enlightenment period when our country was conceived and born. Back in those olden days when there were Lords – those with property and wealth, and there were the rest of the common chattel – those who had to just eek out a living at the pleasure of the Lords.

We’ve come to believe that as we build wealth and “own” things, our rights and privileges increase proportionately. Especially as it relates to ownership of land and property. “Owning” property makes me almost divine, as a little piece of Creation is “mine” to control and do whatever I want with. Such power!

The Lucia family “owns” this wonderful little corner of creation. A tired old couple from another country is enjoying our country’s beautiful coastline, and wants to sit by a warm fire and enjoy a cup of coffee and maybe a little desert. There are those of us in the room who’d love to sit by them and share their story. Their presence will help fill the mostly empty room, and warm it with human kindness. The “owner” sees none of this – she sees only a set of pockets, and weighs only how much silver she can move from their pocket to hers.

I’m conflicted by this, as I suspect any American reader would be. On the one hand, I absolutely support free enterprise, as well as the marketplace pricing and property ownership principles that underpin it. At the same time, it’s clear to me that there’s a selfish streak inside most of us that will allow lust for profit to rapidly turn the steering rudder of our life toward tyranny under the yoke of ownership.

In many cases, the free market will weed out those who succumb to that lust, as somebody else will just build a place down the road that offers a better product at a lower price. Unfortunately, this process is often corrupted by regulation that protects those who already have the property and ownership. In this case, I have no idea why someone else hasn’t put up a couple double-wide trailers down the road to take advantage of the bonanza, but have to assume there must be some regulation that prevents this, but has grandfathered in the Lucia property.

I’m further conflicted here because this is a family operation. It’s a business that a family runs together. I love this. I run a family business with my son. I write and lament often about the loss of the family business, about how big companies have driven the small family operation out of existence. In my own life, I’m usually happy to pay more to do business with local merchants. I’ll always choose a locally owned restaurant over a chain – the prices are comparable, the service is usually fine, and I’m supporting a local family rather than some big multi-national conglomerate. I’ll always look for the hardware store rather than the big box for the same reason. I avoid Walmart’s with a passion.

Here’s this little family operation, and I want to support ‘em. It appears they have 3 generations of folks working at the place. It may be that as their family has grown, they’ve continued to simply expect the business to generate bigger and bigger piles of cash to support more and more people, and the way they’ve done that is to just keep raising prices and spending as little as possible on upkeep.

Every farm family across the country has faced this issue over the last 2 or 3 generations. Increasing farm productivity has meant that prices for farm goods (adjusted for inflation) have dropped continually for dozens of years. An acre of farm land supports fewer and fewer farmers each year. As farm families have grown up, the vast majority of the kids have had no choice but to leave for the city to find work – the farm simply can’t support them.

The difference may be that in the case of a place like Lucia, they’re not producing a commodity like beans where “the market” will define the price. In Lucia, they can keep raising their prices, because demand for a little place to stay right there on the coast is high enough to support their continued increasing prices. The only way a “market” would start to set their price for them is if a competitor opened down the road.

In many ways, it is like the farm analogy I referred to earlier. On the family farm, the dollars of profit from the operation will support a dwindling number of family member, because of dramatically increased productivity. The Lucia clan appears to have many family members that they’re trying to keep employed from an operation that is essentially locked into a particular size, so net “productivity” may have decreased over the years, and they’ve correspondingly continued to increase the price.

The outcome seems fairly predictable. Either someone will offer competition, which will drive the price down and force better service, lower prices, and fewer family members on the payroll, or they’ll collapse under their own weight, as bad reviews slow the flow of folks willing to endure poor service at high prices, and their continued low efficiency grinds things to a halt.

Of course, I’m conjecturing all of this off a very few observations. For all I know they’re business is great now and will continue to be great in the future regardless of what appears to be poor service and efficiency. But it strikes a real chord of contemplation inside me as I sit in the dining room. I’m such a huge fan of small, family run businesses, and here’s an example of one that I’m not a huge fan of. Ten years from now, this place might be gone, and some big multi-national hotel will be on this site, and I’ll lament the loss of the little Lucia Lodge, forgetting the poor service and efficiency.

There’s a balance in all this. There’s no perfect solution to anything. With any way of doing things, there’ll be both bonuses and penalties. I need to realize this whenever I fall into the natural human tendency to long for “good old days” or “that better way” I know about. The Lucia family isn’t perfect, and they could use some lessons in customer service for sure. They’re prices are too high by a lot, and they appear to have been blinded by the arrogance of “ownership”. But they’re a family business trying to make a living in a remote area, and I’m OK giving ‘em my business tonight.

Midwest Book Review give Peace at the Edge of Uncertainty 5 Stars

Midwest Book Review Peace at the Edge of Uncertainty a 5-Star review in July.

Here’s the link, under the  Religion/Spirituality Shelf.

Here’s what they had to say:

“No one knows everything, and coming to terms with such a frightening aspect is key to finding peace. “Peace at the Edge of Uncertainty” is an inspirational spirituality book from Neil Hanson, states that not only is uncertainty not worth fearing, but it should be embraced. His wisdom speaks with some ideas that at first sight, aren’t clear, but he does well in clarifying and providing sound advice. “Peace at the Edge of Uncertainty” states that certainty is a myth, and makes for a thoughtful and uplifting read.”

The Space Between

It’s in the space between one thing and another thing where life’s defined. Those times of transition, where we gather pile a ceremonial cairn of what got us to this point, and turn toward the next. Dorothy and her retinue in Oz needed to make a harrowing pilgrimage to end up on that dais, only to watch in disbelief as what she had believed with all her heart would be the method of her transition floated away without her.

Only in that moment of heartbreak – the space between the hope of the previous moment and the promise of the next –   could she see the bubble of transition, and where it needed to come from.

“Click the ruby slippers 3 times and say …”

I just published a post at Prairie Eden’s website, where I talked about this little window of transition our perennial gardens are going through this time of year in Colorado, mentioning that for the designer of physical space, it’s often the space between things that’s more important than the things themselves.

I recently made my own little pilgrimage of sorts, though I didn’t look at it that way when I planned it. It was simply an adventure – a bicycle ride from Monterey, California back to Colorado where I live. The first 2/3 of it I rode by myself, and the last third with a friend. I’ll be blogging about that ride quite a bit in the upcoming weeks and months, and have posted a summary from which I’ll link to all the other posts as I write them. So far, I’ve only published the summary and first day.

When I arrived at Monterey, I dropped my rented car off at the airport. That point of transition between the drive out and the ride back stands out clearly in my mind. I turned in the keys at the Hertz counter, and got my bike all arranged and packed up. After a quick stop in the mens room, I dropped the jeans and t-shirt that I’d worn on the drive out into a trash can, and rolled my bike out through the sliding doors of the airport into the California sunshine.

I remember looking around a bit as I dropped those traveling clothes into the trash, wondering if the action would look odd to folks. Nobody was looking. The moments of transition I was moving through only had significance for me – not for anybody else. To everyone else, I was just a strange guy wheeling a bicycle through an airport.

I think spaces of transition in our lives are like that most of the time. They consume us as we’re transformed by them, but to those around us, we’re just a strange guy with a bicycle…

 

Book Review – Chasing Francis

Chasing Francis
by Ian Cron
Author’s website

I’m not sure how I ended up downloading this book to my Kindle – I think it was a long-standing admiration I have for Francis of Assisi along with the description of the book. Whatever it was, I’m delighted it ended up on my Kindle, because I really enjoyed reading this story.

It’s fiction, written a bit like a long parable. It’s the story of a young evangelical preacher, and his crisis with faith.

Here’s the author’s (or publicist’s) description of the book:

Author, musician and speaker Ian Morgan Cron sheds new light on the legacy of St. Francis of Assisi, “the Last Christian.” Cron masterfully weaves actual accounts from the life of Saint Francis’ into the fictional story of Chase Falson, a New England minister on a pilgrimage to regain his faith. It’s an amazing story with profound implications for the contemporary church. Read the story, and then learn even more about St. Francis’ radical activism and theology in the robust forty-page study guide.

While at times the story is predictable and over-simplified, I don’t really find this as a fault within the context of this book and this story, as I think it makes the story more accessible for a broader audience.

The story itself is a wonderful one, connecting the church of several hundred years ago with the church of today, helping the reader to see the “unity” or “catholic” of western Christianity. It’s so easy for Protestants today to see ourselves as quite separate from the Catholic Church, but this story does a really good job of illuminating the sameness of both the bright spots and the blemishes. I also very much enjoyed the fact that the author stayed away from doctrine, and talked about the real heart of the Faith, drawing a line from Jesus to Francis, then extending it forward and wondering where it can be connected today.

In all fairness, I have to say that I suspect the author’s view of Christianity is similar to my own. When this happens, it’s always easier to find the good in a book. Notwithstanding this caveat, I do think this is an excellent first book by a young author. I suspect that folks who are firmly entrenched in a right-wing sort of fundamentalist, with no desire to hear a different point of view, won’t like the book. I also suspect that folks who are firmly anti-Christian for whatever reason, with no desire to hear a different point of view, won’t like this book. However, for that vast center of western Christianity – folks with good and legitimate questions who find themselves on the edge of faith crisis from time to time – folks who wonder why the Christianity we practice today seems so distant from the life Jesus led – I think those folks will find this book educational, entertaining, and inspiring.

I highly recommend it!

New Review by Janette Fuller

New Review by Janette Fuller

Janette Fuller published a new 5-star review of Peace at the Edge of Uncertainty last week – check out her comments here. I really appreciate Jannette’s comments! A reviewer named Red Haircrow reviewed the book last week as well, and gave the book only 3 or 4 stars (depending on which review site.) He doesn’t like spiritual books, and readily admits he was probably not the right reviewer for this book. I greatly appreciate that he took the time and energy to review the book even though it’s not a genre he normally reviews.

This points out to me again, (and Janette Fuller mentions this too in her 5-star review), that this is a book that some people will love and some people won’t. I suppose that’s the case with any book, but in this case, the subject matter is quite intertwined with our spiritual outlook. There are lots of folks in the world who want nothing to do with discussions of a spiritual nature, and often become angry and offended when any sort of spiritual discussion emerges. I think those folks aren’t going to like the book.

This is unfortunate, as when I wrote the book, it was my hope to reach out to some of these folks. I wanted to let these folks know that asking questions and wondering wasn’t the same as adopting and accepting dogma and doctrine. There’s lots of mystery in the world, and finding peace with the uncertainty surrounding that mystery is a good thing.

So, thanks Janette for the excellent review, and thanks Red Haircrow for taking the time and energy to review a book that clearly falls outside the realm of the sort of book you enjoy and want to review!

 

Book Review – People of the Book

People of the Book
by Geraldine Brooks
Author’s website

I’d never read anything by Geraldine Brooks, but the premise of the story intrigued me. I’d read no reviews, and had no idea what to expect. I started this story with low expectations and mentally prepared to bail on it and go to something else if it didn’t grab me pretty quickly.

It grabbed me quickly, and held on through the entire story.

The story is a most excellent one, and Brooks does a tremendous job of painting characters that you can believe in and identify with. She masterfully weaves her tale back and forth through history, intertwining it perfectly with the life of the main character. Brooks is high on my list as an author that I want to read more of – I REALLY like how she writes.

The story is a fabricated “what if” history of the famed Sarajevo Haggadah. While the reader knows that both the back story (history of the book) and the main character (a book conservator/restorer) are fictional, they’re so well crafted I found myself wanting them to be real. Ms Brooks outstanding research on the times and people of which she writes makes the history lesson in itself worth the read. Moreover, the voices she pulls from the story seem so authentic I found myself impressed over and over as the story unfolded.

This was an Audible book for me. Listening to books, it’s common to find an author and story I like, but have the story ruined by poor narration. What a delight to experience this recording though, as the actress who does the narration (Edwina Wren) is the perfect physical voice for this story, and does an absolutely wonderful job. Ms Wren enhances and improves the telling of the story with her outstanding narration. This was one of the rare occasions where – after completing the book – I actually did a search for other books that Ms Wren has narrated. The only complaint I have with her narration is that she isn’t all that good with accents (beyond British, Aussie, and American). It’s such a tiny thing within the context of her whole performance that I still give her 5 stars on the narration.

Truly a 5-star book and a 5-star narration.

Oh Brother, Who Art Thou?

A friend and I were corresponding about a road trip she took recently. She reconnected with a brother, and found herself surprised at who he was. She and the brother had apparently not really talked or corresponded for quite some time – maybe 20 years.

I don’t know the details of why the estrangement occurred in the first place. There are almost always all sorts of reasons for these sorts of things. I think part of it was that she made some assumptions about what he must believe, and he made some similar assumptions about her. Probably things got said that reinforced those assumptions.

She has a lifestyle that most folks would call alternative. He converted from something to Mormonism. She was getting wild tattoos way before wild tattoos were all the rage. He was apparently deeply involved in his Faith. She assumed his Faith would have little room for her lifestyle, he probably assumed her lifestyle would mock his Faith.

The years went by. No voices crossed phone lines. No letters came into mailboxes. Email became a “thing”, but email inboxes remained uncluttered by messages from one another.

Then a conference came up that she wanted to attend, and it was close to where the brother lived. A hand was extended, and grasped, and a dinner happened.

And they liked each other. They found one another to be far more open to the other than either had expected. She was, after all his sister. We all have faults after all, and who’s to say which faults trump others, and what are really faults anyway? He is, after all, her brother, and his heart is open and good and accepting.

They enjoy dinner, and are amazed at the similarities they share as brother and sister. They feel the glow of reminiscence as they tell stories they haven’t thought of in years.

In the depths of our DNA, we’re all brothers and sisters at some ancient place. Like my friend and her brother, we’ve all had assumptions and misconceptions woven into the lens through which we see those distant brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, cousins and neighbors. Those assumptions and misconceptions maintain walls and borders that are most strong and excellent. They help the morally corrupt among us sow hatred of anyone a little different that we are. They stoke the machinery of war, and maintain a constant flow of our tax dollars into that machinery.

In the relative scheme of things, I wonder if it was easy for my friend to reconnect with her brother. He’s her brother after all. Or is it even harder with those that we’re closest to? It’s not a matter of forgivingness for past wrongs that I’m talking about – it’s a willingness to be open to truly understanding the other person, without the burden of assumptions and misconceptions.

I think it comes down, once again, to that amazing power our brain has to categorize. We build a category for something, and then our brain does a really great job of sorting the world we walk through very efficiently, placing new things into the categories it’s built. So, I have a brother that becomes a Mormon, and my wonderfully efficient brain drops him into the category it’s built for Mormons. I don’t need to ask him what he believes, and waste all that time listening to how he really feels, when my wonderfully efficient category already has a set of answers.

I don’t need to spend time getting to know my Muslim neighbors, because I have a wonderfully efficient category for Muslims that tells me what I need to know about how they behave and what they believe. I don’t need to waste my time with my coworker who’s quite vocal in his support of Atheism, since my category for Atheism tells me all I need to know about him.

Life is so efficient when we let those efficient categories in our brain work to keep the world around us nice and tidy. We don’t need to think too much. We don’t need to go through the messy and uncomfortable soul searching and self-evaluation.

Or we could get a bit messy, and have dinner with our brother.

 

 

Book Review – Fall of Giants

Fall of Giants by Ken Follett

This is solid 5-star book. It captures you from the first pages, and doesn’t release you until the end. It leaves you ready for the next one in the series, which I guess doesn’t come out for another year or so.

Character development is outstanding, storytelling is among the best I’ve read, and the historical aspects of the book are tremendous. As a reader, I felt pulled deeply into the heart and mind of many of the characters – even the ones I didn’t care much for as people. The story flows quite nicely, as the different threads come together as the storyline develops. Best of all, as a history nut, I LOVED the history lesson I got from this book. I really think this should be required reading for high school students as a lesson in how WW1 happened, and what it meant.

The only other Follett I’ve read is his first series of this sort – Pillars of the Earth and World Without End. In those two books, it was quite uncomfortable for me when he would make his characters endure deep, repeated, and unfair hardship. In this first of this new series, he is much more kind to his characters as he develops them into believable people.

Having now read 3 of his books, I’ve got to say Follett is surely one of the best historical fiction writers of our generation. I can’t wait to read the next in the series!

Monterey to Carmel

Tour of the West – Day 1

Arriving

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

-  Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear, Frank Herbert – Dune

Pulling into the airport in Monterey, I’m a little surprised to feel a touch of dread creeping into my mind. For the past couple of days, this rental car has become my “base camp” as I’ve traveled out here from Colorado. I expected to feel excited at this point – dropping off the one-way rental to begin my journey – but I feel a bit of reluctance to give up the security of the car.

Over the past couple hours of driving up California’s Central Valley, I’ve felt the hint of doubt tickling the back of my mind. I’ve driven a lot of miles to get here, and the many hours in the car have me wondering about whether I’m really up for backtracking those thousand-plus miles on a bicycle – most of the way by myself.

Am I nuts? What on earth makes me think I can do this at 57 years old?

I park the car, and start to rig up my bike for riding. Back in Colorado, I was careful to make sure everything fit. The only “extra” things I brought were the old jeans and t-shirt that I plan on throwing away at the airport. As I rig up the bike, though, I find a few “extra” things that ended up with me. My truck keys for example, that had been in my jeans pocket – not something I want to throw away.

I get stuff bundled up, and decide to move away from the car. I take all my gear and my bike with me to the Hertz counter, drop off the keys, and do my final arranging there in the airport – away from the security of the car. A quick stop at the men’s room, and I drop my jeans and t-shirt in the trash can.

That simple gesture – dropping those clothes in the trash can – seems to lift a weight from my shoulders. As-though I were releasing the last remaining connection with my security and connection to the journey that brought me to this point. Releasing that connection illuminates the place the fear had occupied, and allows me to look forward toward the journey now in front of me.

 

Departing

What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.

– T.S. Eliot

The automatic doors part for me as I walk out of the airport terminal to the sidewalk outside. It feels pretty right for me – releasing my connection to the past, turning, and walking into the sunlight of the future as the doorway opens for me.

At Monterey Airport - Mile 1 Still Ahead Of Me

I lean my bike against a post to take a picture of the bike at the beginning of the trip. I strike up a conversation with a young woman sitting on the bench, who offers to take a picture of me with the bike. My white and untanned legs shine brightly in the picture, but I feel pretty neat documenting this beginning point.

The young woman has come out to Carmel for a writers conference that lasts all week. Ironic, I think to myself. I hope to write about this trip when it’s over, and I start the trip with a conversation with a young writer who travels clear across the country to learn more about how to write.

I leave the airport, and immediately start a little climb. I’m surprised at the weight of the bike, and figure I’ll get used to it as the trip goes along. I feel little pangs and pings in my knees and hips as I climb, and worry about whether or not they’ll develop into real problems in the coming hundreds of miles.

Worry – it’s a deep black hole into which enjoyment of the present falls, never to be retrieved. I’ve learned this lesson throughout my life, and I think of it now as I feel the deep pang in my right knee each time I bear down on the pedal. I’ve always been the “designated worrier” in our family, but I’ve gotten better in recent years. I’ve come to realize that unless there’s something I can do to change the situation, then I need to focus on where I am. In this case, I’ve spent reasonable time getting myself in shape, and what I can do right now is gear down and take pressure off the knees. Take it easy, and put it out of my mind.

The hills are steeper than I expect them to be in the short jaunt over to Carmel. Are they really this steep, I wonder, or is the load on my bike that heavy? Climbing, after all, is where you most notice the extra weight when you tour on a bicycle. Have I brought too much with me?

Worry again.

Neil's Bike at Night 1 Lodging - The Green Lantern Inn

I crest the final climb, and begin the wonderful descent down into Carmel. In the short distance, I’ve climbed over 800 feet, and descend every one of those feet plus a few more. I wind my way through the quaint little tourist town of Carmel By The Sea, and find the Green Lantern Inn, where I have reservations for my first night. I put up my bike in my room, shower, change into walking-around clothes, and head to town for dinner.

I like Carmel. It’s surely the land of the Beautiful People, as they say, but it’s cute and homey, and gives me a warm and comfortable feeling for the start of my adventure. It’s Erik’s (my brother) birthday, and I call and wish him happy birthday. He’s not at all happy about me taking this trip, and has been trying to talk me out of it for months. He has the worry gene too, but much worse than me.

I stand on the beach after dinner, talking to Erik, reassuring him that I’ll be fine. After we hang up, I sit on the beach and think about Erik and I, and consider the difference in how the cancer of worry has manifested itself in our separate lives.

Not that worry is a wholly bad thing – it can certainly help in the decision-making process so long as it’s moderated. In the case of this trip, there are surely things I should worry about – crossing hundreds of miles of desert on a bicycle in the worst month of the year for example – but should I let that worry keep me from a great adventure?

That old Bene Gesserit litany on fear has stayed with me my whole life: I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.

I can easily substitute the word “worry” for the word “fear”, and the litany would still apply. Makes sense after all – worry is just another form of fear. The difference in my mind is that worry is fear of something poorly defined and theoretical, and I usually have very little ability to sway the outcome of the object of my worry. Nothing healthy about that, is there?

Sunset, Sunrise

Either you decide to stay in the shallow end of the pool or you go out in the ocean.

– Christopher Reeve

I’ve lived in the middle of the country my whole life. Mountains and prairie, Ponderosa Pine and oceans of grassland and wheat, this is what home looks like to me. The ocean is a thing of grandeur and magic to me – a real novelty.

I enjoy the sunset on the beach at Carmel, walking around, taking pictures of people, taking pictures of the sunset over the ocean. There are folks out in the water surfing, and I see a couple guys trotting down toward the water.

Confession: I don’t like cold water. I can’t imagine what enjoyment a person could get out of swimming in cold water. This water is cold – way too cold to swim in as far as I’m concerned – yet folks are splashing out there on surfboards and acting like they’re enjoying themselves. It’s just plain crazy, since the best you can hope for is a little wave that might carry you 20 or 30 yards.

After taking some nice sunset pictures, I walk back to my room at the Green Lantern Inn, do a little writing and a little reading, and fall asleep, looking forward to tomorrow. They don’t serve breakfast until 7:00, and I have a short day, so I decide to sleep in until 6:00, and enjoy breakfast. Today marks the beginning of this journey, and the sunset I just enjoyed seems the perfect way to begin.

The Setting Sun to Begin A Journey